Made with Love
Toronto Passions

IN-Call Sydney @ Roommates

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crackerjack

Reviewer
Joined Dec 21, 2009
Messages 135
And another day down on the farm finds yours truly and me wang-bangin’ buddy(aka Lil’Head) furiously pumping plastic out in the barn (Wanda the blow-up doll has been taking a serious licking of sorts over the past few weeks). Poor thing is even walking in bow-legged fashion. Nevertheless; gotta get the boy in shape as a participant for the upcoming Bedroom Olympics this week in B.C. With my lil 4 inch E-talian Stallion now looking totally buff,,,,was time to notch it up with the real McCoy,,,,,going 10 rounds in the ring,,,,inflicting bodice-ripping passion on the next lovely contender. Fired up the ole IBM to take a look see at the available stock out in Triple-X land and noted a mysterious light-weight lurking ‘bout our favourite dooger-dunkin' hole. Hastily confirmed an appointment and quickly stuffed the boy into a pair of boxers for yet another rousing horn dog workout.




Stepped across the threshold to greet Sydney ,,,,the latest secret addition to RM’s expanding stable of lovelies. GASPED!!! in shock and awe,,,,, at her overwhelming decorative collage of body art. SHHEEESHH!!! Hope somewhere under all that ink is a chick. Tried to conceal my plummeting enthusiasm. Choked down that jagged little TOFTT pill and hesitantly followed her down the corridor expecting to wind up in some dodgey biker bar. Cussed Lil’Head for not packing the Harley-Farguson aftershave in our emergency hobby kit.

Exchanged a few more frivolities; ie, her affinity for horseback riding, then whisked my way into the shower for a hearty polishing of the naughty bits. Was in and out in a jiffy and hightailed it back to find my little biker mama cozied up to a very happy pillow at bedside.

Some heavy breathing, some heavy petting and we were trading spit in no time flat. Prolonged the moment as the lady definitely enjoys the pre-coital experience,,,, all the while fondling me family jewels. Things began to heat up as she made her way south and buried the lad betwixt her pearly whites,,,,sucking on the boy like a soda straw in a milkshake. Grabbed her hair and pulled her off the lad with a POP!!!,,,and DFK’d her senseless. With a one-eyed-wink from Lil’Head she slapped the finest in Trojan menswear over the boy,,,,and mounted my little sergeant for a ride through cow country. Certainly wasn’t kidding about her penchant for horseback. Those equestrian knob-busting talents came shining through. With plenty of slurpy grinding, gyrating,,,,, the smacking of pubic bones could be heard two blocks away. Flipped her over for some ball slapping doggy and ferociously pummeled her back fence. Mere moments later,,,amidst the smell of burning rubber and the sound of a woman screaming,,,,nearly ruptured me loins when the boy blew a busload of DNA.

PPPHUCK ME!! Dare say I was a dozen pounds lighter after that one.



Gentlemen……….By the Numbers:

Face: 8
Prettier than the girl-next-door (at least in my neighbourhood) with bone straight brunette hair passed the shoulders, startling blue eyes and infectious smile. And for those into the pleasure of pain,,,,noted a strategically placed piece of barbwire safety-pinned to her nostril.

Body: 7
Guesstimating mid-20 something; 5’6” and every ounce of 120ish lbs. Spidey senses have an inkling that the girl adores ink,,,,and lots of it. Enormous sized tattooes plastered along her right flank. Not certain if she is on the lam,,,,ie; an escapee from the TO’s art gallery or she was side-swiped by a tornado of wet comic books. She sported a smallish bosom,,,,,barely enough to stress a training bra. Not quite ‘B’ cup territory,,,,, nor a mouthful,,,, and both nipples were stapled with the latest in “Alt Girl” doo-dads.

Personality: 8.5
The girl has personality plus,,,,a refreshing find to say the least. Not certain if she is new to the “biz” but spidey senses detected a hint of anxiety. However; very accommodating, friendly, with a genuine interest in giving a rat’s ass that you enjoy your ill-spent time with her. Definitely one that radiates positive energy,,,,and a real pleasure to get naked with on an otherwise gloomy winter’s morn.

Session (GFE/PSE Fun Factor): 7.5
Thru no fault of her own I rated the session lower as this is primarily due to my ‘ole school’ mentality. The Alt-Biker Chick look just is not my cup of tea. I’m like a cringing chicken at the thought of getting a tattoo or ,,,,,perish the thought - a nose ring through the boy’s foreskin. Fortunately her sunny disposition was a saving grace.

Facilities: 7
Yawn like décor with a crowded bedroom and claustrophobic shower. More room to be found in the birdbath out on my front lawn. Speaking of which, the damn shower wand got away from me at one point soaking half the bathroom floor,,,,and probably the neighbour downstairs.

Losses:
$140.00 per hh

Repeat:
None forthcoming anytime soon,,,,unless she takes up my offer to join in next year’s Bedroom Olympics out back of the barn.


Closing Arguments:
Admittedly my shallowness torpedoed the hype around this lil adventure as I fancy a fantasy-chick with porcelain complexion and blemish free alabaster flesh. A basic ham ‘n egg’r like yours truly is not one for metal protuberances painfully poked thru various orifices in the female form. Prefer my artwork hung on a wall rather than the female figure. Nevertheless, a gold medal performance ensued,,,, as the boy received an Olympic world-class workout in Horizontal Bop. Move over Mr. Bilodeau. Lil’Head is Ready to Own the Podium.


Gentlemen, it’s the kid’s inheritance. Be careful out there!

Good day and good farmin’
 

olayda

Well-known member
Joined Jan 5, 2010
Messages 320
Rip said:
Farming is good business thank you for giving me a laugh.

Thanks CJ. Entertaining review.

I don't mind tats ( got a small one myself ), but I know what you mean if it's a little ovecommunity
 
I

iceman_dci

Guest
Did you yell "YEEHAW, STICK IT IN YER GRANDMA!!!"...? :???:

Entertaining review CJ. Found myself reading it in a backwoods southern drawl.

I've got ink, little ones, and big ones, and I like a girl with ink and staples...I also like the non decorated type...Hell, I likes em all!!
 
D

Demien2k5

Guest
As Mr. Burns would say: "Excellent!" :twisted:

Ya' beat me to her dude, and I am indeed jealous - I LOVE this type of girl and definitely need to see her very soon, as she really sounds like my kind of kinky chick! :mrgreen:

Thanks for the review!
 
B

Beenthere123

Guest
king21 said:
Superb review CJ, you have a way with words. Looks like another lady for my TDL!

I loved your review CJ even though I understood half of it.

Just kidding :razz:
 

olayda

Well-known member
Joined Jan 5, 2010
Messages 320
Demien2k5 said:
As Mr. Burns would say: "Excellent!" :twisted:

Ya' beat me to her dude, and I am indeed jealous - I LOVE this type of girl and definitely need to see her very soon, as she really sounds like my kind of kinky chick! :mrgreen:

Thanks for the review!


Watch out Sydney.
 

forestgrumpy

Well-known member
Joined Feb 1, 2010
Messages 431
Demien2k5 said:
As Mr. Burns would say: "Excellent!" :twisted:

Ya' beat me to her dude, and I am indeed jealous - I LOVE this type of girl and definitely need to see her very soon, as she really sounds like my kind of kinky chick! :mrgreen:

Thanks for the review!

:lol::lol:

Thanks CJ for the decent review.
 

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