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PokerDude

Senior Member
Joined Dec 19, 2009
Messages 229
Rip, many great recommendations in this post. The hobby is what it is. Once a month is a tough pill to swallow. Much easier for your love life to fizzle than to put the heat back in it. When the sex is gone, it's time to move on.
 

GDLLover

Well-known member
Joined Dec 8, 2009
Messages 439
PokerDude said:
Rip, many great recommendations in this post. The hobby is what it is. Once a month is a tough pill to swallow. Much easier for your love life to fizzle than to put the heat back in it. When the sex is gone, it's time to move on.

RIP, I believe your fiance thinks that everything is great and sex once a month is ok for her. The amount of sex is not going to increase over time, it will get less if anything. If your thinking the SP route already before your even married you really need to evaluate before getting married. For example, right now its pressures of a tired work day, how are you going to feel when there are kids involved and she doesn't want to even do the once a month thing because she is more tired or 'the kids will hear us'?

By no means are we telling you what to do, its just you do raise some serious questions as to getting married going in with problems, marriage will not make it better.

There is an old joke that laugh as we may is true. Prior to marriage, put a penny in a jar for every time you have sex. After marriage you can now take a penny out each time. As hard as you try, you will never empty the jar. The sad part is you probably only had a couple years to fill the jar but yet emptying the jar you will spend 50+ years and still not come close to emptying it.
 

GDLLover

Well-known member
Joined Dec 8, 2009
Messages 439
iceman_dci said:
Wise words GDL.

Unfortunately, its a do as I say and not as I do type of thing.

I do think marriage can be ok if both are willing to put the effort in, but for the vast majority both partners neglect each other over time. Women neglect the sex portion, men neglect the emotional bonding portion. I have the same problems and am just as guilty so i'm no saint. I do feel though that I put more effort in than recieved so I justify hobbying because of it.

RIP, does have a chance to address the problems before marriage and the discussion of improving the sex frequency should be done now otherwise it will be taken for granted and never get fixed.
 

CallmeMatt

Well-known member
Joined Feb 13, 2010
Messages 65
GDLLover said:
. Prior to marriage, put a penny in a jar for every time you have sex. After marriage you can now take a penny out each time. As hard as you try, you will never empty the jar. The sad part is you probably only had a couple years to fill the jar but yet emptying the jar you will spend 50+ years and still not come close to emptying it.

Many have died trying.
 

CallmeMatt

Well-known member
Joined Feb 13, 2010
Messages 65
GDLLover said:
I do think marriage can be ok if both are willing to put the effort in, but for the vast majority both partners neglect each other over time. Women neglect the sex portion, men neglect the emotional bonding portion. I have the same problems and am just as guilty so i'm no saint. I do feel though that I put more effort in than recieved so I justify hobbying because of it.

RIP, does have a chance to address the problems before marriage and the discussion of improving the sex frequency should be done now otherwise it will be taken for granted and never get fixed.

Spoken like a true Vet. The young man should listen to all good advices here. Going to see a SP as you call it here is not what he should be concerned about, being stuck in a monogamous relationship with no sex should be his worry.
 

Rip

Member
Joined Feb 13, 2010
Messages 12
Your responses had me thinking. Last night I surprised her bought chocolates and a bottle or red wine. She became very friendly after we finished the wine and started talking about our sex life. I mentioned we are too young to be having sex once a month and just a peck in the cheek for kisses. She began crying and telling me the spark is not there anymore but still loves me.

She mentioned I am not romantic enough, I don't listen to her when she speaks and watching sports is my idea of having fun. We do not go out to the theater as we used to, do not open the car door for her nor put her coat on as before. More of the same for another hour and made me realize I have to change to keep this relationship. I pointed out the negatives in her and ended up in a fight cause she couldn't take my criticism.

Not a good day, thanks again for all your help.
 
B

Beenthere123

Guest
Rip said:
Your responses had me thinking. Last night I surprised her bought chocolates and a bottle or red wine. She became very friendly after we finished the wine and started talking about our sex life. I mentioned we are too young to be having sex once a month and just a peck in the cheek for kisses. She began crying and telling me the spark is not there anymore but still loves me.

She mentioned I am not romantic enough, I don't listen to her when she speaks and watching sports is my idea of having fun. We do not go out to the theater as we used to, do not open the car door for her nor put her coat on as before. More of the same for another hour and made me realize I have to change to keep this relationship. I pointed out the negatives in her and ended up in a fight cause she couldn't take my criticism.

Not a good day, thanks again for all your help.

Run RIP run out of there as fast as you can.
 

PokerDude

Senior Member
Joined Dec 19, 2009
Messages 229
Rip said:
Your responses had me thinking. Last night I surprised her bought chocolates and a bottle or red wine. She became very friendly after we finished the wine and started talking about our sex life. I mentioned we are too young to be having sex once a month and just a peck in the cheek for kisses. She began crying and telling me the spark is not there anymore but still loves me.

She mentioned I am not romantic enough, I don't listen to her when she speaks and watching sports is my idea of having fun. We do not go out to the theater as we used to, do not open the car door for her nor put her coat on as before. More of the same for another hour and made me realize I have to change to keep this relationship. I pointed out the negatives in her and ended up in a fight cause she couldn't take my criticism.

Not a good day, thanks again for all your help.

RIP, they always say the grass is greener on the other side but it looks like your relationship is circling the drain. If she claims that "you have to change to keep this relationship", she's putting the responsibility squarely on your shoulders. May be time to think of an exit strategy or at the very least postpone the wedding date to give you both some time to think.

Seeing an escort at this point may not be the best idea. Might trick you into thinking you can always go out for cake since you're not getting any at home.

I went through a similar situation fairly recently. We both realized that although we both still loved each other, the flame had dwindled and we weren't going to get it back. There was nothing left to do but walk away. A tough pill to swallow but it was the best medicine.
 
S

Senor Gomes

Guest
PokerDude said:
. May be time to think of an exit strategy or at the very least postpone the wedding date to give you both some time to think.

Seeing an escort at this point may not be the best idea. Might trick you into thinking you can always go out for cake since you're not getting any at home.

I went through a similar situation fairly recently. We both realized that although we both still loved each other, the flame had dwindled and we weren't going to get it back. There was nothing left to do but walk away. A tough pill to swallow but it was the best medicine.

Excellent advice.
 

GDLLover

Well-known member
Joined Dec 8, 2009
Messages 439
PokerDude said:
RIP, they always say the grass is greener on the other side but it looks like your relationship is circling the drain. If she claims that "you have to change to keep this relationship", she's putting the responsibility squarely on your shoulders. May be time to think of an exit strategy or at the very least postpone the wedding date to give you both some time to think.

Seeing an escort at this point may not be the best idea. Might trick you into thinking you can always go out for cake since you're not getting any at home.

I went through a similar situation fairly recently. We both realized that although we both still loved each other, the flame had dwindled and we weren't going to get it back. There was nothing left to do but walk away. A tough pill to swallow but it was the best medicine.

Excellent comments Pokerdude, I will add that RIP may not realize is that your SO won't be too receptive to criticism, she will take it personnally so you have to accept some responsibility and ask to joinly work together to improve. I'm not surprised that she threw it in your face, but the question is why didn't she say something if all the bonding stuff was bothering her? Its still best that you have gotten into this dissagreement now than a total blowout after the wedding (who knows she could also have ended up cheating on you). Best to come to a solution now before its too late, I believe your relationship can be saved if both of you are willing to work on things. A one way street it is not and if she doesn't change her opinion you are in a world of hurt for life if you go through with the wedding.
 
H

HOF

Guest
RIP, you chose the right handle. I was your age, when I married my ex-wife, who was your lady's age. Bought the house-paid cash, no mortgage, had my dog, two new cars. Life was grand or so I thought. My ex had never been with anyone else, we had been together almost 5 years in toll. Married for 3 months, and she leaves, while I"m at work and cleans out the house. I never cheated, etc, I was in love! Proceedings start, lots of drama. Then, one morning the phone rings, my ex-wife tells me she's pregnant. WOW. This is 5 months since the happy wedding day. I say, let's get a blood test done. She cries, it's yours. I said, we'll get a blood test done. Thankfully, I persued the blood test issue because it wasn't my child, I have no black genes in me whatsoever!

Be forewarned, if your sex life is boring now, you're better to be single and happy! You have not invested your life and you're very young still. Either make your concerns known to her or leave before the real drama starts.

Learn from my mistake!
 

gudnite

Well-known member
Joined Dec 7, 2009
Messages 110
HOF said:
RIP, you chose the right handle. I was your age, when I married my ex-wife, who was your lady's age. Bought the house-paid cash, no mortgage, had my dog, two new cars. Life was grand or so I thought. My ex had never been with anyone else, we had been together almost 5 years in toll. Married for 3 months, and she leaves, while I"m at work and cleans out the house. I never cheated, etc, I was in love! Proceedings start, lots of drama. Then, one morning the phone rings, my ex-wife tells me she's pregnant. WOW. This is 5 months since the happy wedding day. I say, let's get a blood test done. She cries, it's yours. I said, we'll get a blood test done. Thankfully, I persued the blood test issue because it wasn't my child, I have no black genes in me whatsoever!

Be forewarned, if your sex life is boring now, you're better to be single and happy! You have not invested your life and you're very young still. Either make your concerns known to her or leave before the real drama starts.

Learn from my mistake!

If your onll getting sex once or twice a month I'am pretty sure she isn't. Don't forget this goes both ways. If she's only 24 she has needs too and if your not giving it to her sexually some else is. You need to have more than just sex to hold your relationship together. Good luck bro
 

Smooth

Well-known member
Joined Jan 31, 2010
Messages 707
HOF said:
RIP, you chose the right handle. I was your age, when I married my ex-wife, who was your lady's age. Bought the house-paid cash, no mortgage, had my dog, two new cars. Life was grand or so I thought. My ex had never been with anyone else, we had been together almost 5 years in toll. Married for 3 months, and she leaves, while I"m at work and cleans out the house. I never cheated, etc, I was in love! Proceedings start, lots of drama. Then, one morning the phone rings, my ex-wife tells me she's pregnant. WOW. This is 5 months since the happy wedding day. I say, let's get a blood test done. She cries, it's yours. I said, we'll get a blood test done. Thankfully, I persued the blood test issue because it wasn't my child, I have no black genes in me whatsoever!

Be forewarned, if your sex life is boring now, you're better to be single and happy! You have not invested your life and you're very young still. Either make your concerns known to her or leave before the real drama starts.

Learn from my mistake!

Words of wisdom! Very wise you insist on the blood test although when the baby popped I think you would have know something didn't look quite right.
 

Jawbone

Well-known member
Joined Jan 26, 2010
Messages 951
Is this the Hoff from ****y land, welcome. I unfortunalty have been banned from the other board, your reviews were one of the ones I did enjoy to read.
 
B

Beenthere123

Guest
Jawbone said:
Is this the Hoff from ****y land, welcome. I unfortunalty have been banned from the other board, your reviews were one of the ones I did enjoy to read.

Hoff welcome to the board have to agree you got balls of steel when you write your reviews. They are always entertaining and honest. Hope you can write some here.
 

Rip

Member
Joined Feb 13, 2010
Messages 12
Thank you all once again. I cancelled the wedding last week, her parents called pissed off she cried for days. Came home last night and she was gone, no note just an empty house. Feel lonely and depressed but will get over it (I hope).
 

GDLLover

Well-known member
Joined Dec 8, 2009
Messages 439
Rip said:
Thank you all once again. I cancelled the wedding last week, her parents called pissed off she cried for days. Came home last night and she was gone, no note just an empty house. Feel lonely and depressed but will get over it (I hope).

RIP, sorry to hear that she didn't want to work things out, its a shame that she had the attitude its all your fault. Its hard to believe right now but could have been worse. If you got married then you would not only have an empty place but also alomony on top of your current situation to add insult to injury. I hope you made it very clear that you wanted to work it out and she didn't being the reason for the wedding cancellation. Thanks for letting us know what happened.

BTW now that it appears you need the distraction of an SP, give us more details of what type of lady your looking for we all want to help you with some suggestions.

So far; "I need to see an escort that kisses passionately, enjoys to be pampered and is a nice person." Give us more to work with and we can narrow it down, there are many great ladies out there with different styles and more details will hopefully get you what you seek. Preferences if you have them such as origin, height, body type, age, hair color, GFE/PSE, etc.
 

mynameismo

Well-known member
Joined Jan 18, 2010
Messages 660
RIP, you will get over it but will take time. We are here to help you, Iceman and GD have good advice.
 

Rip

Member
Joined Feb 13, 2010
Messages 12
GDLLover said:
So far; "I need to see an escort that kisses passionately, enjoys to be pampered and is a nice person." Give us more to work with and we can narrow it down, there are many great ladies out there with different styles and more details will hopefully get you what you seek. Preferences if you have them such as origin, height, body type, age, hair color, GFE/PSE, etc.

Never had CIM curious to know what it feels like, questioning myself if I want to try anal. White, Pretty, slim to curvy. Hair color and height unimportant, well-mannered and experienced with good communication skills.

Am I asking for too much?.
 

Wilsonjso

Well-known member
Joined Nov 12, 2009
Messages 2,650
Rip said:
Never had CIM curious to know what it feels like, questioning myself if I want to try anal. White, Pretty, slim to curvy. Hair color and height unimportant, well-mannered and experienced with good communication skills.

Am I asking for too much?.

No Rip you aren't.

[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected] ( I didn't see Tyler but I think that she fits what are you looking for right now, as the others that I listed).
[email protected]
About Greek go for [email protected] Girls Toronto she's amazing or Holly as well.

Sebelle: rocks,
Hailey: shy,

If I were you I would go for Holly first, Natalie or Tyler, Melody, Sebelle and Hailey. Anyway all are awesome girls you'll have a great time independent that who you see first.
 

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