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Has your wife changed her menu post-marriage?

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Joined Sep 10, 2015
Messages 1,482
My wife is a lovely woman - physically speaking. Personality? Not so much. I guess I have always given her a pass because of her physical beauty.

Unfortunately, I have come to the conclusion that she will never improve her menu and therefore I have lost all guilt I once had in regards to my hobbying activities. Most weeks, I talk to my wife and ask her what her menu will be:

'Sweetie, what is your menu today?'

My wife responds by saying that she will ONLY give me a HJ. I almost invariably tell her that a HJ is not really a menu item. I tell her that offering me a 'HJ only' is equivalent to a restuarant only serving garlic bread.

Ironically, when I met my wife in 1998, she was much different. In fact, on our second date, I performed DATY and DATO on her. Yup, second date and I had my tongue in her bum. So, I envisioned things going much better during our marriage.

Over the years of our marriage, the menu has gone from the odd BJ performance to her proclomation that my penis won't fit in her mouth because her mouth is too small. Smh.

Now she says that when I touch her, she feels too ticklish and itchy and can't stand it.

I have asked my wife if I could have sex with her friend who is coming to stay with us this summer. To my surprise, my wife became angry and accused me of being dirty-minded. I thought the idea of having sex with her friend would be a win-win for all of us. My wife doesn't want sex, her friend does, and more importantly, her friend told my wife that she is very fond of me. My wife often told me how much her friend thought of me.

I am planning on travelling to to China next year and I told my wife I have plans to re-visit my old girlfriend who lives in Shenzhen. Again my wife became upset at the idea, but again, my wife is actually friends with my ex-girlfriend and so I don't see how such an idea would cause a problem.

My wife also gives me the silent treatment after I come home from an escort visit. She calls me names and gets very angry upon my return home. But, I always ask her - 'Why is your menu so bad?' I tell my wife that if she improves her menu, I will not touch another woman. However, if she doesn't improve the menu, I will continue to touch other women.

Fellow Hobbyists, has your wife changed her menu post-marriage compared to when she was your girlfriend, pre-marriage?
 

papasmerf

Senior Member
Joined Aug 9, 2010
Messages 33,654
Perhaps you should reflect upon yourself before you reflect on her.

Men tend to forget what drew her to him in the first place.
 

Prim0

Senior Member
Joined Jun 29, 2010
Messages 10,859
My wife's menu has been going downhill since the 6 months of dating mark. I think that was about the time period for any of my long term relationships. If I had it to do all over again, I'd probably be single or in lots of 5-6 month relationships.
 

RED

Reviewer
Joined Jan 9, 2012
Messages 1,189
All wives menus changes after 6 months. Why we log on here and other sites looking for lobster instead of shrimp.
 

Poroit

Senior Member
Joined Jan 10, 2012
Messages 424
She only had a take out menus, sadly didn't include main courses.
 

peace

Reviewer
Joined Dec 23, 2010
Messages 29,082
....fucking her friend would get me in tons of troubles married or not. lol
 

Sha

Active member
Joined Aug 26, 2014
Messages 25
Don't they all change their menu and gain 40 lbs to make sure you look for SP?.
 

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