Oliver stone said:A friend of mine wants to borrow money again. I lend him $2000.00 last year and it took him 9 months to pay me after he said he would in 2 months. Now he wants another $1500, don't want to lose him as a friend but don't want to give it to him. Have lost one other friend because of similar situation.
What would you do.
I give my friends money, I never lend money. If I give someone money, I do not expect it to be returned. If I cannot afford to give them anything, I frankly tell them up front - I can't afford it, sorry.
When someone I love and care about is in a tight spot and really needs help, I consider it my duty to be there for them. I do not give people the label "friend" lightly, a friend is someone I feel a kinship with, a bond thicker then blood ties. We are each others guardians through life.
Now if they want it for a new fancier car - forget it. Luxury desires don't count. If they need it to pay bills, deal with a medical situation, or some other issue of import to their lives, and I can afford it: yes! Take it!
If I give a friend money and they choose to pay me back, I am flattered, and will generally set that money aside for them in case something happens in the future.
I didn't always have this philosophy. However, I have two close childhood friends who supported my choice to join this lifestyle. Of course by the time I was 20 I was making a hell of a lot more money then them. I started helping them out - pay for school books, buy them gas, pick up groceries. Little things to make their lives easier because I was in much better financial circumstances then they were. Honestly, I felt good about it. And they very much appreciated the gestures. Our friendship became far more intimate, caring, and much more like family then it ever had been before. I never want to marry or have children, and I realized my friends are my family and I have to take care of them as best as I can.