Made with Love
Emma Alexandra Page

DISTRAUGHT AND ALONE

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Chongqing

Reviewer
Joined Aug 26, 2015
Messages 32
Like MisterAsianLover says, women are always looking for the BBD.

Yes the BIGGER BETTER DEAL

They are like Monkeys, swinging from vine to vine, metaphorically men are the vine. She has grabbed on to another vine and let you go in the process...

My advice to you would be to go out and hate f**k as many women as possible and NEVER give your heart or get involved/commit to one ever again. Just hobby for the rest of your life. I recommend Club Globe and Bulmsap in Zurich Switzerland. Lots of 8, 9's and 10 to bang

Good luck and happy punting

Cheers - Chongqing
 

SillyGirl

Queen of Boots and Cupcakes
Joined Apr 7, 2017
Messages 7,250
Big hug, Baz...I'm really sorry you're going through this. When the person next to whom you are planning on being buried leaves without warning, it's like a knife in the heart. I remember it well.

I couldn't imagine it at the time, but now I feel like I should send him a Thank You note.

Your life has taken a sharp turn that you didn't see coming, but that doesn't mean your future is bleak and you'll never feel happiness again. I know you don't believe that right now. Your not believing it doesn't make it untrue.

Get out of bed every day and take a shower. In retrospect, this was the most valuable piece of advice I got.

Give yourself this week for your meltdown, then get your shit together and go back to work on Monday. Staying home and letting yourself wallow in your misery is not mentally healthy.

GET A LAWYER RIGHT NOW. You'll both profess to want to keep things amicable. There is no amicable divorce.

Yes, be civil -- but understand that she is not looking out for your interests anymore. Nor should you be looking out for hers. These days, I could really use those tens of thousands of dollars I gave up by being nice.

I hope you have people in your life you're close enough with to really talk openly with. Talk to them. If you don't want to talk, write. Write to us, keep a journal, draft letters to Ida that you will never send. However you do it, please vent that rollercoaster of emotion that you're on.

Please let us know how you're doing. Like it or not, you're part of the family around here.


:BigHug: :BigHug: :BigHug:
 

SillyGirl

Queen of Boots and Cupcakes
Joined Apr 7, 2017
Messages 7,250
Ok, here's a question. Down here, if I've had consults with multiple divorce attorneys, none of those attorneys could then represent my Ex. Is that the case in Ontario?

If so, Baz, your job tomorrow is to find out who are the ten best attorneys in town, and schedule your consultations absolutely as soon as possible.
 

papasmerf

Senior Member
Joined Aug 9, 2010
Messages 33,654
SillyGirl said:
Ok, here's a question. Down here, if I've had consults with multiple divorce attorneys, none of those attorneys could then represent my Ex. Is that the case in Ontario?

If so, Baz, your job tomorrow is to find out who are the ten best attorneys in town, and schedule your consultations absolutely as soon as possible.


I like the way you think
 

Raiden

Reviewer
Joined Nov 6, 2009
Messages 6,565
SillyGirl said:
Ok, here's a question. Down here, if I've had consults with multiple divorce attorneys, none of those attorneys could then represent my Ex. Is that the case in Ontario?

If so, Baz, your job tomorrow is to find out who are the ten best attorneys in town, and schedule your consultations absolutely as soon as possible.

*mental note* never piss off SillyGirl.

Good luck Baz and try an escort, it's fun, no strings, no drama, no baggage. You just pay and go.
 
Joined Feb 18, 2014
Messages 1,734
SillyGirl said:
Ok, here's a question. Down here, if I've had consults with multiple divorce attorneys, none of those attorneys could then represent my Ex. Is that the case in Ontario?

If so, Baz, your job tomorrow is to find out who are the ten best attorneys in town, and schedule your consultations absolutely as soon as possible.
I think I saw that on the Sopranos.
 

peace

Reviewer
Joined Dec 23, 2010
Messages 29,082
Sorry to hear about your tough situation. The reality is that pain will linger for a long time but hopefully you will learn and grow from it. I hate to say this and some people may think im too pessimistic but nothing good lasts forever.
 

peace

Reviewer
Joined Dec 23, 2010
Messages 29,082
....one more thing, perhaps you should take off and travel a bit if you can. it will keep your mind busy and distracted. When you return home, you may be able to manage the absence and pain better.
 

Madman

Reviewer
Joined Aug 12, 2011
Messages 17,543
peace said:
....one more thing, perhaps you should take off and travel a bit if you can. it will keep your mind busy and distracted. When you return home, you may be able to manage the absence and pain better.

That is a great idea and Baz, you should take me with you. One, I make a great wingman and 2) I will keep you laughing and having a good time.
 

peace

Reviewer
Joined Dec 23, 2010
Messages 29,082
Madman said:
That is a great idea and Baz, you should take me with you. One, I make a great wingman and 2) I will keep you laughing and having a good time.
If you are taking up Madman's offer, bring your own ear plugs and do not accept any apple pie from him.
 

Baz

Senior Member
Joined Feb 29, 2012
Messages 1,854
I'm touched by the outpouring shown here to me, thank you good folks. I will be speaking with my lawyer today, I'm not sure if Ida has yet but I don't see anything difficult in regards to asset splitting since there are no children involved. Our incomes are fairly equal , we've built everything we have together so therefore a 50/50 split is reasonable in my mind. She left the family home but I don't believe this makes a difference. I'm hurt that she hasn't returned my calls or texts. I stopped participating here as she requested but now I feel she no longer has the right to ask this of me. The feelings I'm going through are quite a roller-coaster. At one moment I'm disappointed, heartbroken then I'm angry then back to feeling like I want to cry. I know with time I'll start to feel better but I'm not sure if there is another soulmate for me out there?
 

peace

Reviewer
Joined Dec 23, 2010
Messages 29,082
Not the time to think of another potential "soulmate" Baz. Have you considered exploring Europe or Asia (much cheaper)...
 

Madman

Reviewer
Joined Aug 12, 2011
Messages 17,543
peace said:
Not the time to think of another potential "soulmate" Baz. Have you considered exploring Europe or Asia (much cheaper)...

Why would you think Baz needs a mail order bride? Baz, let's take a cruise! Let's do it! You and I, two pals on the hunt for sex, food and wine!Hmmmmmm Is that the right order?Hmmmmmm
 

Baz

Senior Member
Joined Feb 29, 2012
Messages 1,854
Madman, I've only traveled with Ida. It would make for an interesting vacation but I first need to get everything in order. I love my home and I couldn't sleep last night thinking if I should buy her out or sell it and move on. I live in the beaches area and the price of homes in my neighborhood is mind boggling to say the least.
 

papasmerf

Senior Member
Joined Aug 9, 2010
Messages 33,654
Baz said:
Madman, I've only traveled with Ida. It would make for an interesting vacation but I first need to get everything in order. I love my home and I couldn't sleep last night thinking if I should buy her out or sell it and move on. I live in the beaches area and the price of homes in my neighborhood is mind boggling to say the least.

Remember she abandoned you and the marriage bed.
 

Baz

Senior Member
Joined Feb 29, 2012
Messages 1,854
papasmerf said:
Remember she abandoned you and the marriage bed.

Yes she did but under marital law she will be entitled to 50% of the home as unfair as it seems. I will know more after speaking with my Lawyer later today.
 
E

ERecTile

Guest
Baz said:
I'm touched by the outpouring shown here to me, thank you good folks. I will be speaking with my lawyer today, I'm not sure if Ida has yet but I don't see anything difficult in regards to asset splitting since there are no children involved. Our incomes are fairly equal , we've built everything we have together so therefore a 50/50 split is reasonable in my mind. She left the family home but I don't believe this makes a difference. I'm hurt that she hasn't returned my calls or texts. I stopped participating here as she requested but now I feel she no longer has the right to ask this of me. The feelings I'm going through are quite a roller-coaster. At one moment I'm disappointed, heartbroken then I'm angry then back to feeling like I want to cry. I know with time I'll start to feel better but I'm not sure if there is another soulmate for me out there?

Did she know of your hobby and your participation in this forum? Sorry, not sure if I'm reading that right.

With no kids involved, you have a chance to make this split as simple as possible. If you are ok with a 50/50 split, then go for that. As for buying her out, that puts a huge strain on your finances, plus you'll always feel that you were paying her for her leaving. In your shoes, I'd probably get the house valued as soon as possible, sell it, and split the money. On the flip side though, with the housing market what it is, there's no way in hell you'd find a similar house or something half as good as what you have right now.

No matter how simple it may seem, this has potential to drag on. Start documenting any bills that you are paying for the house. Just because you're still living in the house does not mean that you should foot the bills after her departure. In my mind, she's still responsible for half the bills simply because she chose to leave. Deduct half the cost of any bill from the eventual settlement. There has to be some sort of impact on her for her choice to leave.

Also, it doesn't sound like she's willing to talk about the reasons why. So you'll accept (for now at least) that you will never know. Focus on the split and the settlement. Deal with the emotional pain later - if you can.
 
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